Georgia GOP Outlaws Water for Liberal Fish

ATLANTA, GA--On the heels of their move to dehydrate voters in long lines, the Georgia GOP has announced a new initiative to bring the...

Governor’s Mansion to Install Democracy-Proof Foam Front Door

ATLANTA, GA--The Governor's mansion, built in 1967, has revealed a critical security flaw. Lawmakers hiding inside to pursue the normal course of voter suppression...

MATURE HEADLINES

Microsoft CEO Announces He Can Be Mostly Gay by Q2 2015

REDMOND, WA--Continuing its commitment to be about 75% as good as Apple, Microsoft has announced...

Hillary Clinton Announces Candidacy for President of “Yeah, No Shit”

WASHINGTON, DC--Ending two years of "Oh come on already," Hillary Rodham Clinton announced her candidacy...

Clint Eastwood Mobbed By Frisky Septuagenarians at Johnny’s Hideaway

ATLANTA -- Legendary film star Clint Eastwood, 81, in town shooting "Trouble with the Curve,"...

November Cold Snap Heralds the End Times

ATLANTA--Pack up your belongings, load them into a truck, and light the truck on fire,...

Assault Rifle Used to Replace Rickety Table Leg

ATLANTA--As anyone who watches the news knows, assault rifles are literally everywhere in our city....

Long Wait List for Atlanta Charter Strip Clubs

ATLANTA--In recent months, seven different charter strip clubs have opened in the metro area, but...