Local Voices Desperately Needed to Report They Don’t Know Future of Masquerade

PHOTO: Elijahlight

ATLANTA–The city has urgent need today for those willing to voice their thoughts on the future of local concert venue The Masquerade without the benefit of any facts on the matter. Huffy tweets are encouraged, although users are cautioned to stick to sensation and conjecture.

We took to social media for some examples of the kinds of reports the city currently requires.

“We simply don’t know what will happen,” said Frank Ulysses Daniels, local expert. “We have no idea, and that lack of an idea is underscored by a dearth of information, which, in turn, has led to a vacuum of knowing-ness. Experts call this kind of thing a ‘knowledge desert.'”

“It’s sad, really,” said Fiona Uriah Draper, concert attendee. “It’s just sad. Really, really sad, and it means terrible things for the future of Atlanta, whatever it is that happens or doesn’t happen.”

But Francis Urntz Dingletarn broke with tradition, by stating that he remembered several irrelevant things. “It really takes me back, you know? Back to when I was there, at the place, with those guys. God, those guys. They were doing it, man. Really doing it. It was late at night or day and they were hitting it so hard or soft. I felt it. You felt it. WE felt or did not feel it and you might not have been there — hell, I might not have been there — but I remember.”