I want to be happy for you, I really do. And I want to congratulate you on your success. But I can’t very well congratulate you on success you’re just making up out of the blue. Which is why I am so conflicted about your new Creative Director position at Burblefloo.
I’ve been burned before. Remember when I congratulated Sebastian on getting a gig as a VP of Sales? I was so jealous! …until I found out he was still the only employee at Crazy John’s Pets. My face is flush just thinking of it.
But at least I’ve heard of Crazy John’s Pets. Burblefloo sounds exactly like something a child might say before it learns to talk. Or the noise you might make while trying to get your face out of an oscillating fan.
And the web site is no help. Miles of marketing copy but no actual words.
I just can’t tell whether or not I should be jealous. I guess I’ll know if you buy a new car or something.