Investors Deny Funding to Startup That Uses Windows Laptops

It's just wrong. Come on guys. Get your act together.

ATLANTA–Angel investment firm Fundem & Hough backed out of a deal late yesterday that would have supplied first round funding to startup AppFind, a location aware mobile app that helps locate other location aware mobile apps. The firm’s principals say they simply couldn’t get over the fact that the developers who founded AppFind primarily used Windows laptops rather than the industry standard Macbooks.

“It was just weird, sitting in a meeting with those guys,” said Rick Dennison, partner at Fundem & Hough. “They had the printed tee shirts and trendy jeans. They had the lattes and the weird old timey facial hair, but they also had black plasticy-looking Windows laptops.”

Dennison says when he walks into a startup’s office with the money to fund a small company’s dreams, he expects to see the silvery sheen of MacBooks. “It was just wrong,” he concluded.

AppFind founder Dustin Premble is bewildered, his dream in tatters. “We can buy three decent used Windows machines for the cost of one MacBook Pro,” he said, unable to hide his emotion. “We thought investors would be impressed with our thriftiness. Oh jesus, we were so wrong. I’m sorry, guys.”

Premble and his team have been working 120-hour weeks to get a prototype of their application ready for the meeting on Monday, sleeping, eating, and showering at their desks.

Dennison says that dedication is admirable, but business is business.

“I know those guys worked hard, but if they want to be taken seriously they’ll get some Mac laptops,” he said. “Or at least spraypaint those Windows clunkers they use silver, for god’s sake. I mean, come on.”