O, ye hairy-necked titan,
How I pine for thee.
Your chess game, so tight,
Whether starting black, or white.
Lo, I have an opening for you, sir.
My mind is beaten sick,
In a sea of fetching douches,
Who have decent hygiene. Pshaw!
My body needs a mind for mine.
I am willing to bear your pit stink.
Ravage me, you avid cyclist!
Regale me with research lab woes!
Let us do it like they used to do it
Upon yon Discovery Channel,
Before television went goddamn insane.
I am yours!
Just to be clear,
I will have sex with you.