Atlanta Natives Have Never Heard Of Atlanta Tourist Destinations

Atlanta's Underground offers a thriving nightlife, as long as you like living alone.

FIVE POINTS–The Atlanta Tourism Board announced concerns today that native Atlantans “have no idea” many of their most popular tourist attractions even exist.

“It’s quite unfortunate,” Tourism Board President Dee Lusionale revealed. “Many native Atlantans are within a few minutes’ drive of, say, Underground Atlanta, but will never know the pleasure of an Atlanta panhandling or the reassuring fine of a PARK Atlanta ticket.”

“And who doesn’t want to be reminded of the horror of the Civil War at our lovely Cyclorama? I mean, come on, Atlanta natives! Sheesh!”

The Atlanta Banana interviewed citizens on the street this weekend to gauge your opinions on Atlanta tourism.

Peter H. — I can’t understand why anyone would want to drive downtown and pay a parking fee to see empty stores and cheap crap when I can just as easily do the exact same thing at Lenox with free parking.

Wanda L. — I think I went to the World of Coke once, but my memory is pretty hazy. Do they put the Coke on a huge mirrored dining room table? If so I was there once for sure.

Daniel R. — So let me get this straight. There’a an Atlanta Tourism Board that lists 50 things to do in Atlanta, and there’s no mention of The Clermont Lounge? Who made that list? Probably someone who sucks.

Michelle F. — I thought I was going to a bunch of different locations of the High Museum last year, but I was actually just going to museums while high. I’m not going to lie, it’s a good time.